Some People Feed off Negativity

That's what my boss does. He is a bully who "feeds" on negativity. Like some people "feed" and live on Beauty, Joy, Harmony, he feeds on negativity. Very hard to deal with. How do I respond to this? This is some of the issue. My response to his hostility is to be instantly hostile back. Feels personal. This is the part where the ptsd and trauma kick in. It FEELS personal. I go into a parent/child type relationship.

It also helps to know and really clears up a lot of stuff to know that consciously. That he literally feeds off negativity. Knowing that, in many ways, helps me separate myself from him and not take all this so personally. Also because he is so much like my father. The very worst of everything of my father. And this guy, from what I can tell so far, after two weeks, has NO redeeming characteristics. Nothing. I can't find anything about this guy that is even vaguely human. He KNOWS a lot of stuff but has internalized NOTHING.

At least my father had some redeeming characteristics. He was fun, funny, helpful, loved to tell jokes and do magic tricks. You could have some type of reasonable conversation with him. This guy mumbles to himself. I call him Golum (from Lord of the Rings).

The most important thing to remember and stay in touch with is where my soul is grounded. And that my soul is grounded in harmony with the universe. Not that I'm perfect by any means, but I know that my soul is grounded in harmony with the universe. That's probably some of reason why dancing feels so good to me. It helps me to move in harmony. Sometimes I can feel that the earth is spinning. It's really hard to imagine that the earth is actually spinning all the time and we don't feel it.

Anyway. I don't know what happened to this person in life and what would make ANYBODY feed off negativity and have to be in such absolute control over everyone in the most negative of ways. He's the guy with the money so anyone who has to/is willing to/does take, money from him, he controls in a hideous way. I don't know how much longer/if I can continue to work for him. If the woman I'm working with leaves, I'm not sure what I'll do. The thing that is throwing me over the edge is that he's messing with paying me. On top of everything else.

Golum.